Overwhelming Emotion

I am not a big fan of overwhelming emotion. Especially when the emotions have such negative connotivity. I am having one of those nights.
I keep hating kk's dad. I am so uncomfortable with hatred. It only comes naturally to me in this one instance. I can see how black it makes my heart and I want it gone. I keep asking God to take it away and make it His problem, not mine, because I know that all He wants me to do is ask for His help. But it doesn't go away. I know that things don't happen on my timeline, they happen on God's, so I am not mad at God for leaving me with this darkness in my soul about this matter. I just want it gone.
Another Christmas and birthday come and gone with no communication. He knows how to get ahold of us. I have always encouraged him to communicate with kk, until the last time he did it, and I have never and will never stand in the way of the two of them having the relationship she deserves to have with a dad.
Maybe it never bothered me because my dad has always been around, and he is such a wonderful example of how good men can be, and what they are supposed to do and how they should act. But now that they have moved I have no males to spend time with her and I fear so badly that she will grow up with a skewed view of how important a male's opinion is. I have already seen it with her- and it makes my skin crawl!
I know as far as single moms go, I am one of the better ones. I dont take financial aid of any kind for her, I talk to her all the time about everything, and I try really hard to do guy things with her like teach her about football, or have burping contests, or whatever. But I can't do it all, and I can't replace a dad.
I know how important my dad is to me, and it breaks my heart that kk doesn't have that. I also know how important her dad's dad is to him, which is why I can't understand why he would take that away from his own child.
I have so many questions and no answers and the rage I have about just this one issue eats me up inside. I hate feeling this way. I don't think about it often, but every once in a while something will happen and I have to emote this or it will turn me into a completely negative person.
I jsut hate him, hate the situation, hate wishing he was dead, hate the person it makes me, and I am glad it is not all-consuming. I just distract myself out of it most of the time.
Thanks for listening.